Matthew 19:4-5 KJV
“And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh”?
Yesterday we looked at the first part of how to failure-proof your marriage through balanced and considerate family blending. Today I want to show us a few more points that will help you win the confidence of your spouse; especially in a new marriage.
HOW TO BLEND PROPERLY
v) Draw a line between your family and your spouse all the time: You cannot permit your family to cross their boundaries with regards to your spouse. Never permit any kind of insult from your family to your spouse, ever! Your spouse must enjoy your unconditional protection from any harmful thing coming from your family all the time.
vii) This works by adequately and properly leaving: This means proper disconnection in certain vital areas from your family. Avoid anything that would give them power over you and over your spouse.
For instance, you cannot be financially dependent on your family. That is not a very good idea. They cannot be your primary source of counsel or advice; especially with the wrong doings or shortcomings of your spouse. Have a pastor or pastors. Your family cannot be receiving feedbacks of your spouse's frailties and failures. They are not supposed to be your first line of report.
viii) . You have to control your appetite for visiting your family as a married person. It is imperative that you spend more time with your spouse, and seriously cut down on frequent home visits.
ix) Be a peacemaker where there are quarrels, disagreements or misunderstandings in your spouse's family. Particularly where it concerns your spouse.
x). Never speak ill of your spouse's family to your spouse as a weapon of quarrel or misunderstanding: Whatever you do, never insult your spouse's family. There is no other means by which yours spouse could have come into this world for you to marry them, aside through their family. However bad, poor, broken or messed up your spouse's family may be; it is the only means through which God saw fit to bring them into this world. There is deep respect in the heart of every person for his or her family; no matter how bad they may be. So, to insult their family is to despise and insult their entire existence.
xi) In an event where your spouse may have offended your father, mother or siblings; please never let them make the apologies alone. Especially when you know they Have been hostile towards her or him.
Assignment
i. Go over today’s message all over again.
ii. Pen down corrections that must be made.
iii. Have a discussion with your spouse over these matters and come up with a plan.
Prayer
-Lord I thank you for this word.
-I receive the grace for a sound and balanced family blending in Jesus Name.
Nugget
Your family cannot be your primary source of counsel or advice; especially with the wrong doings or shortcomings of your spouse.
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