Last
week, we were hit with photos of a lady who reportedly left her wedding
reception, to rush down to school to write her exam in her wedding gown.
The
300 level Economics student of Benue State University, Makurdi, identified as
Dooshima Aondaver Moses in an interview with our correspondent, why she took
that decision.
Here
are excerpts from her interview;
•
When did you start planning for your wedding?
The
whole thing started in 2016. That was when both of us, my husband and I decided
to settle down as husband and wife. As a graduate of the same department, my
husband understands everything very well, so we were working with the academic
calendar. The wedding was supposed to come up in the first two weeks of the
second semester of 300 level when there would not be much academic activities.
Unfortunately,
the university had an internal crisis which led to the closing down of the
university for three months and when we resumed, we thought that the wedding
would still hold after the examination but shortly after the local strike was
called off then came the national ASUU strike. We still thought that the strike
would drag until after our wedding but lo and behold, the strike was suspended,
all these changed the academic calendar.
•
But why didn’t you shift the wedding date?
There
was no way we could have called off the wedding because all arrangement had
gone far and families and friends from far and near had been informed. So it
became extremely difficult to cancel it as many people from Lagos, Abuja and
other places had been informed of the October 7 date. So calling off the
wedding would have disrupted other programmes. At the time the national strike
was called off, the time table for the exam was released.
•
At the time the time table for your exams was released, what efforts did you
make to convince your department to give concession to you?
The
time table was released immediately the national strike was called off.
Although I informed the department but they told me there was nothing they
could do. They said since the time table was already out, there was no time for
me to lodge any official complaint. They said if that had happened before it
came out, the department might have considered that. Again, the problem is that
I was so busy making arrangement for my wedding. It was the same week that we
did the traditional wedding, court marriage and church wedding. I decided to go
ahead with the marriage and at the same time prepare for my examination.
•
What was the course you did that day with your wedding gown on?
International
Economics and I did it well to the best of my knowledge.
•
How did you cope preparing for your wedding and your examination at the same
time?
Actually,
it was not easy for me. I tried to strike a balance by running around and at
the same time reading for the examination, it was not easy at all but one thing
that kept me going was the fact that I had made up my mind not to carry over
any course because of my marriage. So, that decision was my soothing balm.
•
At what point did you leave the wedding venue for the examination hall?
We
had concluded the church ceremony because the marriage was held at Good News
Chapel, Benue State University. We were at the reception and shortly after we
entered the venue, I had to excuse myself and the train and quietly sneak out,
pretending to go to ease myself. Although a few of the bridal train are my
course mates, so as I sneaked out, so also my course mates who were in the
bridal train. We all rushed down to take the exam.
•
What vehicle brought you to the exam hall?
It
was the same vehicle that I used for the wedding that brought me. The point is
that my husband, close family and friends were aware of the plan; so right from
the church service, we had to rush the programme, the pastor that officiated
our marriage, Pastor Jude, was also aware of the arrangement, he tried to
minimise the service until we got to the reception. A few of the officials at
the reception were aware of the arrangement.
For
instance, the chairman of the reception while addressing the crowd, noted that
everything had to be done moderately because the couple needed to meet up with
other pressing matters. He did not mention it particularly.
As
the reception was in progress, my husband and I were watching ourselves and
checking time intermittently so as not to be late to the exam hall because
Economics department is very strict with examination guidelines. So knowing
this, I was very conscious of time.
You
know that many of my course mates were also at the reception, so all of us were
cautious of time; in fact, many left the reception before me. But it is assumed
that weddings should be savoured to the fullest without any distraction; didn’t
you see it that way?
Well,
I see marriage as a lifelong enjoyment, so I did not want to use one to
jeopardise the other. It is true it was the day of celebration and many people
were at the reception to celebrate me, but I had another important thing which
was my examination.
•
Your paper was fixed for what time?
It
was scheduled for 3pm to 6pm that Saturday, it was a three-unit course.
•
At the time you left the reception, what was the reaction of people and did
your husband also follow you?
Well,
few of my relations as I earlier said were aware of it, but I learnt there was
tension when other guests did not see the bride again, according to what they
told me. But gradually, the crowd thinned out; so there was no problem at all
but my husband remained behind at the time I left together with a few of the
bridal train who are my course mates.
•
Was there distraction at the time you entered the examination hall?
Since
all of them were aware and most of them attended the wedding, there was no
distraction at the time I entered the examination hall.
•
You were not afraid that anything could have happened as you left your husband
at the reception?
Nothing
could have happened because it was our plan not to rob Paul to pay Peter. A
pastor named Isaac was the one who drove the car that day; four of my train
were in the same car that brought me, so all of us walked into the examination
hall including the pastor.
•
Was there no time for you to change your wedding gown to normal dress at the
time you came to the campus?
Actually,
when I came in, I tried to manage the time. Ordinarily, the department has a
dress code while coming to class but having eaten into the time, there was no
time for me to go and change my dress, after all they were all aware of the
wedding ceremony. I am sure that was the privilege they gave me to take the
exam. Since you said that you were in the examination hall throughout the
duration, it means you could not go back to the reception?
My plan initially was that I would do the paper and rush back to the reception.
Unfortunately, by the time I finished, the whole thing had ended. When I called
my husband, he said he was already in the hotel sleeping.
•
Now that the day had come and gone with the drama created by your action, how
will you describe the day?
October
7, 2017 will remain evergreen in my life, a blessed day because it is every
woman’s dream to get married. I can not forget the day because the wedding
coincided with my examination which I was able to take.
•
Your examination is still on. As a new couple, you ought to be in honeymoon
now.
(Cuts
in) To me, I see every day in marriage to be honeymoon, not just to set a few
days off for honeymoon. I think what honeymoon means is for your spouse to pet
you, kiss you, hug you, take you out and all that but to me, life is in stages.
So whatever you have to do, it is better for one to do it well. So for me,
honeymoon is a lifetime experience.
•
Do you have advice for those planning similar thing in future?
My
advice to young ladies is to be determined because the way to success is not
easy. One needs determination, discipline and focus, because for me, forgoing
reception for examination is discipline. I was determined not to fail as any
other person could have said there is no big deal, I can carry over the course,
but for me, I didn’t want to carry over the course because I have no reason to.
Despite the fact that it was a celebration day, I needed to do what was the
most priority on my list which was my examination. We should not take things
for granted, when it is time to do something, it is better to do it.
See more pictures below...
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