The actress and her handsome sons, 9-year-old D’Marion and 5-year-old
Ayden, who were the cover stars for the latest issue of
Motherhood-Instyle opened up on experiencing depression and why has
didn’t marry her baby daddy.
See excerpts:
On why she’s not with the father of her children:
‘Well, I just had to make that decision though it took me a long
time to realise or stop lying to myself that it was never going to work
out even though I tried as much as I could.
‘I just decided that what’s best for me is to walk away and still be
here and be with my kids and still have the opportunity of being the
best mother possible, so yeah, I had to make that decision.
‘It was
really tough, it was really painful; I think that hurt me the most out
of anything that I have ever been through in my life, walking away was
the hardest thing to do.’
On if they were ever married:
‘Well, we were never married. We were together for eight years
but in the state of Kentucky, it’s a commonwealth state and commonwealth
state is if you live together for a long period of time you might as
well be considered married but on paper, no, never been married before.’
On overcoming depression :
I think the major thing that got me through was the fear that
somebody else would raise my children if I sat in that relationship,
that was the scariest thing for me, that my kids would see somebody else
as their mother. Depression is no joke.
‘A lot of people in this country, Nigeria, don’t want to admit that
depression is an illness. People don’t know the extent to which it
affects the mind. ..
‘Not a lot of people know this; in the past I have tried to commit
suicide because it was just too much, just too much for me but I guess
God loves me enough to still keep me here.’
On being a single mum in Nigeria:
Well, even before I moved back I definitely didn’t like placing
myself in that ‘single mother’ status. I’m a parent. Yes, it takes two
to become a parent but hey, when it’s one, let that one do the best they
can.
Now, how I have been able to cope in Nigeria? The same way I was
able to cope in the States, doing it all by myself. I am truly happy
that I experienced certain things over there in the States.
If I had
experienced those things here in Nigeria, I probably would have just
killed myself long time ago because this country is tough. But as tough
as this country and its people are, I’m also a tough cookie and I never
give up.
If I set my mind to do something, regardless of what it is, I
will get it done.
The time for myself is gone, when you have kids it’s
not about you anymore, it becomes about the other lives that you have
brought into this world so my main focus, my main goal is about my
children and they have been my drive and my motivation from day one.
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